That'll Teach Ya, Mom

Every Cat has his or her routine and it's up to the humans to respect it. After all, they're the ones with the hands. My routine starts no later than 5:15 AM. I go tell Mom and Dad I want to go out and it's their job to get out of bed and let Me out. Dad does it when he's home, but if he's on the road, it's up to Mom to do it.

At 5:15 this morning I walked into the bedroom and announced to Mom that it was time. She got up dutifully and went to the back door, but I was hungry. I wanted to eat first. I wanted some treats first. I wanted some rubs and scritches first. Then I wanted to go outside. Even a Cat with a routine is allowed to vary it as he pleases, right? Of course right. She gave me the food, but was rather rude about the treats, rubs and scritches. She said it was 5:15 in the morning (So?), and a Sunday morning at that (Double so?), and she was going back to bed! And she did.

We weren't done yet and I told her about it.
She was stubborn.
I complained.
She told Me to Be Quite.
I got louder.
She pulled the covers over her head.
I put it into high gear. After all, I'm not called Demando for nothing.
She threw a pillow at Me.

At that point I left the room and went off to sulk about it, as loudly as I could. That's when I noticed this...

It's the window Mom forgot to close last night. Even better, for some reason the screen was up too, leaving the window completely open and clear. Guess what. I jumped out.

Around 7 AM I could hear Mom getting up. I heard her make her way into the kitchen and turn on the coffee pot. I knew she was puzzled that I didn't present myself immediately. I heard her call my name. Silence. She called again. She started going from room to room calling "Rascal!" Of course I didn't answer and of course she couldn't find Me.

I could almost hear the wheels in her head turning. I could also hear worry in her voice. She probably thought I'd finally succumbed to my Feline Lymphoma and had curled up somewhere to leave my body behind while I crossed the Rainbow Bridge. She was thinking that the 5:15 scenario had been my way of saying good-bye. I knew this would make her feel guilty.

I heard her go into the bedroom to get dressed. I knew she was trying not to panic and would go let the chickens out while she collected herself. I timed it perfectly. As she came out the back door, I nonchalantly walked past the back porch and meowed, "Good Morning." You should have seen the look on her face!

Of course Mom's not dumb and she quickly found the open window and figured it out. If she's mad, she should suck it up and take it like a Cat. To make it up to her I'll spend the rest of the day testing out the new area rug she got for under the dining room table.

It's pretty comfy, actually. Happy Mother's Day.