Don’t Use That “O” Word On Me!

I knew something was up because Mom was acting very suspiciously. She had been on the telephone, but suddenly left the room. In a few moments she came back, scooped me up, and stuffed me into the prisoner transport unit she calls “The Carrier.” Drat!

Then we had to take a drive in the car. I hate that. To let her know about it, I dug down to the bottom of my oriental roots and vocalized with the greatest despair. I was superbly pathetic and quite loud. Everyone who heard me from their passing cars was thoroughly convinced that I was dying in that car. I was hoping to make Mom realize how cruel she was bieng to me. I think I succeeded. She felt so bad she started to cry, though she may have been laughing, I couldn’t tell for sure.

Then we got there. I could tell from the smell. We were at the V-E-T. I heard something about “yearly check-up” and “shots” before I was whisked off to a small room with a cold stainless steel examining table. Mom set the PTU on the floor after the door was closed. She opened the front so that I could come out if I wanted. I cautiously took half a step out, looked around, sniffed the air and then hissed. I quickly withdrew to the only security available to me, that dreaded carrier.

I must say that the V-E-T was very gentle and the shots didn’t hurt a bit. But what did hurt was after she weighed me and declared me “overweight.” What!!?!?! She patted my poochy (hey! that’s off limits!) and showed Mom a chart which was obviously formulated by some quack. It said that my 16 pounds 2 and ½ ounces put me into the overweight category. She said that I should really weigh 14 and a half pounds. According to whom, I ask you? It's not my fault that I can't go outside anymore and get more exercise.

Tell me, do I look overweight to you?



















Er, wait a minute, wrong pic. That's my bad side. Forget you saw that one.

I say, tell me, does this sleek, active, athletic looking Me appear overweight to you?













Everyone is fully aware of Mrs. B’s ordeal and I have no intention of undergoing the same torture. Who comes up with this "overweight" business anyway?