It Wasn’t Me
Scene: Mom has been making sugar cookies. She has just stepped back into the kitchen after putting the wet laundry into the dryer. Rascal has been minding his own business.
Mom: Rascal, what have you got on your nose????
Mom: What have you got on your nose!!??”
Rascal: My nose? There‘s nothing on my nose.
Mom: What have you been into?”
Rascal: Who me? Nothing.
Mom: Come ‘mer, let me see your nose.”
Rascal: Well, I gotta go.
Mom: Get back here, I want to look at your nose.”
She makes a move toward Rascal and grabs him. Rascal struggles unsuccessfully.
Mom: Rascal, there’s flour on your nose.”
Rascal: It wasn‘t me.
Mom: How did you get flour on your nose?
Rascal: I'm innocent.
Mom: The only place there’s flour is on the kitchen counter.
Rascal: Didn’t you spill some on the floor?
Mom: There’s no flour on the floor, only on the counter top. (raising her voice) And Cats are not allowed on the kitchen counter!
Rascal: Well, I think I hear the birds calling me.
Mom: Rascal, get back here.
Rascal: Nice talkin’ to ya Mom. I’ll see ya later!
Mom, examining the counter top: Rascal! there’s kitty pawprints in the flour up here!!
Rascal (over his shoulder): It’s okay Mom. There wasn’t anything up there for Cats anyway.
Mom: You’d better hide, Young Man, you’re in big trouble.
Rascal, hiding in the bedroom closet and washing his face: Good grief. The things I have to put up with around here.